8 Comments Family & de facto law, financial agreements, consent orders
Less than 52 nights a year is below regular care. A court will usually hand down an order for at least regular care (52-127 nights PA)She needs to be aware of that & also needs to be aware that should the matter go to court, that legislation still requires that the possibility of equal shared care be considered in most cases.
So to help with an answer, tell us the kids ages, & what level of care you are realistically able to achieve in practical terms.
Also both of your incomes if possible.
jaazzz 2012-11-02 08:27:27
I am able to provide 100% care for the children.But just want the kids to be a part of both of our lives. I work in the child protection industry and don't want my kids to miss out on both parents. I am earning up to 100k a year and have a new parnter that does not work. She is more then willing to help. My x was left with a fully operational piggery and a 2500acre farm with over 1 million in assets. The childrens age's are from 8year old twin girls, being the oldest and 3 being the youngest. I have told her what I will do but she has her mother in her ear telling her no no no. I have shown her the act both child protection and the family law act but still keep getting the same answer. NO YOU CAN"T.
Well, she needs to know that her MIL's views will count for nothing in court. In fact it can be a definite liability.
I suggest then that you just get the required s60I certificate from FDR & file for parenting orders & interim orders for 2 nights a FN & half of school holidays. That's the level of care most likely to be handed down unless you are able to satisfy the court that it's in the childrens best interests & is practical for you to have a greater level of care.
[QUOTE=Rick7394] The question I have is can I go and pick up the children and can she stop me from taking them for the weekend. [/QUOTE]
Sorry, just noticed this. My advice, DO NOT do this. She will probably have the police called & you will be asked to leave, possibly even have a restraining order placed on you. Also a very bad look in front of the children police or not.
You are however within your rights to not provide her with your new address if you have concerns. A contact phone number though is a reasonable request.
Don't take the kids. In the short term may make you happy. But it will escalate things. You don't need the grief, so what i reckon what you do is this. nothing.
File for mediation. Let things ride. I fought hard to get as much time with the kids as possible. I dropt $20 000 in my solicitor's pocket and still have no extra time with the kids than was agreed informally shortly after the separation. After 15 months she calls all the time begging me to take the kids. I have 4 nights a fortnight and will have 5 nights from next year. But have patience...
By the way, someone stated that you'd be lucky to get 2 nights a fortnight in court. Dont cop that. I have an 18 month, 3 yr old, 6 year old. I'm a teacher, which helps with holidays. By the time youngest turns 2 I'll have 5 nights a fortnight and 1/2 holidays.
My other advice is be strategic. Not malice, but realise this is a crap game. I've won my ex's trust, not to abuse it but to try and make a decent post marriage relationship, I've told her I won't contact child support informing them of any extra time with kids without discussing it with them first. BUT I'm also prepared to pay extra child support for the next 12 months. In 12 months time we will re-do mediation, I will continue to agree to pay extra child support, but I want 6 nights a fortnight. In 2-3 years I'll say no extra payments. Either I'm cunning, or I'm a decent person paying extra for a few years to help her get on her feet post marriage. You decide.
Best of luck
Thanks, this woman and her mother are suffering Malicious Mothers Syndrome, I see it in the industry I am in all the time. She is using the children as a weapon, and yes I did nothing, I am still at home and my children are with her. This illness and that is what it is, is becoming more and more less tolerated in courts and is child abuse take it from me someone that is in the Child Protection Industry. It is hard for me to be here and not see my kids, but i am doing it.
It for me, is not about child support or what she has or has not got, thing is she is in a 3 way business partnership with her mother and her step father and I hate the thought of the money I pay going towards the 100 pieces of kentucky fried chicken her mother eats a week. Yes that right a week. However I am getting off the subject here, I rang her on her mobile and her landline along with her mothers to speak to the children and was hung up on. This is, no matter what is said against the law, so if this is happening to you act on it send all messages to your X in writing don't speak to them write it down. Keep it all in writing, I have a bible here of emails. Going to my family lawyer next friday and well going from there. Guys Know your rights don't take it laying down.
[QUOTE=Rick7394] Thanks, this woman and her mother are suffering Malicious Mothers Syndrome, I see it in the industry I am in all the time. [/QUOTE]
Wow. Malicious Mothers Syndrome - sounds pretty close to my ex (and quite a few on here overall).