Hi. Depending on what state you are both in, depends on the answer. In a lot of cases, there are free services that can be looked at, even if the court has specified which service to use. If the other party refuses to do mediation, then the mediation service you use will usually issue you with a letter for the court to state this. The court will then see that all avenues were considered and tried and make a judgement accordingly. If this mediation is outside of any court, then they don't have to do mediation at all. What they must realise, when making this decision, is if it does eventually go to court, how will the Judge see that decision? It may very well go against them. If there was domestic violence involved previously, then the mediation service will not allow mediation to happen. There is also the alternative of doing mediation via phone, which most mediation services will do. Again, it depends on which state you are in. As for the new partner and where he is financially, he will not be required by law to pay for anything.