by viper  15/08/2007  1872 Page Views
39 Comments  Family & de facto law, financial agreements, consent orders

Hi there, Im a newbie to these forums but have a few questions to ask about paying child support!

Ok ..Ill try to cut a long story short.

Bascially I have split from my partner of 5 and a bit  years and we have a 4 year old daughter who was born in 2003.

Prior to getting pregnant - he was living in my house that I paid off my X husband for and never contributed anything to the mortgage and rarely any bills - he also earned substancially less money than I do as I have been in my fulltime government job now for around 18 years.


Anyway - after my daughters birht , I went on maternity leave for 6 months. I went back fulltime as there was just not way that my patners salary would even pay the mortgage and bills each month..which was no drama at the time....I knew on his salary that he couldnt support me staying at home with our baby.

It was decided that he would work from home on a part time basis while still looking after our daughter and of course do all the mundane housework stuff since I was going back to work 5 days a week and afterall I earned alot more than him so could afford to pay the mortgage and bills etc.

When she was 2 we decided to put her into daycare for 3 days a week as he was not really keeping the house clean and tidy ( put that down to laziness I think !) so I figured 3 days to himself to get what had to be done, done as well as having 1 day to just veg out and do what he wanted ..anyway ...

About 15 months ago I decided to end the relationship because I was beginning to resent him for being able to stay home with our daughter and watch her do things of a day while I was working 5 days a week and missing out on time with well as he was crap at keeping a house tidy even with 3 days out of a week without a child to take care of.

Sorry...I was going to keep this short but its hard.

So 15 months ago we split but he remained in my house and I continued to pay for everything because well ...he was only still working a few hours a week from his computer ( he designs web sites) so had no money, no family here to stay with and doesnt drive.  I couldnt kick him out on the street as I knew not being able to see his daughter each night would be too heartbreaking for him.

For the last 15 months he claims that he had been looking for a fulltime job..I nagged him every week about it as it was ridiculous that we had split yet here he was living in my house still and him not working fulltime....I just didnt want this arrangement for the next 10 years - if you know what I mean.

I dont think many people would have put up with stil supporting their X and paying for all bills etc and even buying his smokes I did.  

Anyway he finally moved out to another house about 2 months ago (after arguing wiht him to get out or else) with a friend, his friend had to pay  the bond and is paying most of the rent and bills as he still hasnt found a fulltime job ( despite me paying half of the money for a security guard course for him to do so that he could find a good paying job) ....I was that desperate to get him out of my house and get a job ...I didnt care that I had to fork out $350 for half of the money for the course!!

So...he completed the course and passed and has his security guard licence but for some reason he still cant find any fulltime security guard jobs.

Since he earned about $6000 last financial year and we are now not living in the same house and he is struggling for money....he is applying for the FTB payment from centerlink and so they told him that he had to lodge forms for child support from me.

We have 50% shared care of our daughter - he has her 3 nights a week and I have her 4 nights a week.

He picks her up sunday mornings and has her at home with him till wednesday 6pm where I pick her up after I knock off work and then keep her till sunday mornings.  I of course have to put her in daycare the 2 weekdays I have her as I work fulltime.    The 3 weekdays he has her ...he is at home with her as he does a few hours paid work during the night while she is sleeping.

So....he's told me he needs money to live Im going to get hit up for child support ..I did the calculator on the CSA website and from the look of it I will be paying his share of the rent for him each week ..grrrr.

So along with my mortgage ( that I have ALWAYS paid on my own) and all my bills , insurance, cost to run the car, childcare, credit card payments and a personal loan now loks like I will also be paying the equivalent to his share of his rent each week..while he is going to get some FTB payments from centerlink and also earning a lil money from his part time work.

How the hell is this fair????????? Ive worked out that if I have to pay him that amount of CS each week it will leave me with hardly any money to live on or to do things wiht my daughter of a weekend!!!

All...because I was responsible enough to get a very well paying job and have been there for 18 years !!!!!!!!!!

I called the CSA about this and explained it all to them ...I said ...where will his incentive be now to go out and get a fulltime job when he will be getting money from centerlink for FTB, and now from me and then also earn a lil from his part time/casual job!!!!

It bloody sucks!!!  Has anyone come across this where the mother has to pay CS to the father who isnt earning much????

Whats my chances of objecting to paying so much and winning?