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breach of trust/defamation of character?

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robmac67 View Drop Down
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Joined: 14/January/2012
Location: Australia
Posts: 9
  Quote robmac67 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 18/January/2012 at 04:03
Hi FG

The root cause as to why I sent the prick an email in the first place was because they contacted me and invited me to confide.

To put that into perspective, my sister and I are adopted and have always been made to feel outsiders in the family. As a result of this and the other stuff, we have been estranged from the family for 10 years, so it was poignant that they contacted me.

Actually, it was my Aunty who contacted me, and I think it was her husband who has done all this.

Why, I don't know, and why my Aunty (to whom I was fairly close) has said nothing, I don't know either. She is the timid, submissive type, so my guess is that my 'Uncle' has reacted badly and my Aunty was told to keep out of it.

As he is a bit of loser and I've recently achieved some success, I think it might just be a case of envy and putting the boot in - attempting to keep me at the bottom of the totem pole.

In any case, it's xxxxxxed.

Regarding cloudy judgement and throwing caution to the wind, see post to MO above. At this stage I'm just evaluating my position.

MickOne View Drop Down
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Joined: 29/November/2010
Location: Australia
Posts: 283
  Quote MickOne Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 18/January/2012 at 10:12
Hi Rob,

My last points on common-sense and your situation: your correct and incorrect. The law is not completely based on common-sense and the concept of common-sense is a misnomer. But, if you do not apply some sense (Let's remove the offending term) to your decision on whether or not your best interests are served by accessing legal remedies you are going to use the legal means available as a weapon rather than a solution.

You have studied law, so you have a theoretical basis and theoretical understanding. So let's talk about the concept of legal remedies, they too are a misnomer. For most situations they are not a remedy in the common understanding, they are merely an outcome - which will lead to other actions.

To my mind, even a person of limited means could see that you will have none-to-very little evidence of you claims and tell you: "bring it on". At which point the sensible move is to call your bluff as accepted. And, that I imagine is not a solution.

So let's remove the concept of "Can I?", and replace it with some introspection of "Should I?". But, as you have pointed out, my common-sense is not your common-sense.

Finally, you really should be consulting a solicitor in the field of Defamation, that way you can lay out the full gambit in a conversation that is privileged. They will be able to give you a realistic opinion on your actions chance of success.

I wish you well in getting your resolution and hope that your intended path is the least destructive to all concerned.

Atikin View Drop Down
Senior Member
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Joined: 12/June/2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 257
  Quote Atikin Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 18/January/2012 at 11:40
RobMac it really seems the real issue here is the abuse. Do you realise you are already streets ahead of a lot of abused people in that a)you haven't blocked it out and b) you are ready to deal with this arsehole.
Most people can't confront their abusers but it sounds like you can - that means you are incredibly strong. Maybe talk to a consellor about it all and then decide what action you are going to take. Good luck.

robmac67 View Drop Down
Newbie
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Joined: 14/January/2012
Location: Australia
Posts: 9
  Quote robmac67 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 20/January/2012 at 17:52
Thank you for your thoughtful words, Atikin.

Up until 7 years ago, I had suppressed it - just basically hated and blamed myself and occassionally would put it down to adoption and my being a broken-head. But an event happened that broke it all open and I went to counselling and it changed my life.

Unfortunately my sister keeps blocking it out and just blames me for everything as Dad (the abuser)encouraged her to do (though she can't explain exactly why or what for). That's what psychopaths do (which psychologists have diagnosed him to be) - they love to control people and torment their minds. And this is far worse than the physical abuse and is why most children in these situations start thinking about suicide very early on.

With my sister refusing to confront it and in no real position mentally and emotionally to do so, it's difficult to move on because the past is still there. My only hope is that one day she will want to get help and we can leave all the bullsh*t behind.

In regard to confronting the abuser, the prick died 10 years ago - a clean cut, sober 'respectable' educated public servant. After counselling, now I wish he wasn't dead.

Thanks again for your comments. I talk about it very rarely as people's reactions (like my Uncle's)are usually negative and insulting. I remember having that same attitude when I was younger and liked to act tough about it - as that unsympathetic toughness is embeded in our society and mores. In a survey a few years ago, it was revealed that 75% of Australians are more concerned with petrol prices than child-abuse and something like one in two people would not believe a child if they claimed they were being abused.

As child-abuse is on the rise and costs over $20 billion anually, it's time the issues are tackled, but will I suspect continue to get swept under the carpet.

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