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Complicated property settlement, time to move on

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Andyjaxon View Drop Down
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  Quote Andyjaxon Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Topic: Complicated property settlement, time to move on
    Posted: 01/November/2017 at 13:52
I have recently left the family home after 22 years of marriage. One son living at home 20 yrs of age and at uni. (No part time or casual work)
The property situation is;
Marital home with a mortgage, joint names.
Private shares in the company I work for, in my name and purchased prior to marriage.
Investment property, 80% mortgaged in both our names.
My super.
I am fit and healthy and earn a respectable income.
My wife doesn't (Can't) work and suffers from mental illnesses. (Has so for 10 years)
Total nett assets approx $1,000,000.00.
I have already seen a lawyer who in a nutshell says that i"m scr*wed. He suggests a 80 - 20 split in her favour and I will have to pay spousal maintenance.

Lets assume that this is all correct and to avoid giving it all to lawyers, I agree to all of the above. The questions I have are;
1. (Understanding that spousal maintenance is ordered to support the other party based on the ability of me to pay and what is deemed to be fair and just.) How do you determine the length of time that spousal maintenance runs for and can you offset spousal maintenance with an increase in the 80 - 20 split?
2. (my ex is likely not accepting of me leaving and would do anything to keep me) How do you obtain the fastest possible resolution to the settlement? Assuming she doesn't agree to sign anything regardless of it being a good financial position for her.

Your comments are greatly appreciated.

Lyall View Drop Down
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  Quote Lyall Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 04/November/2017 at 19:16
That's a nasty situation. I feel for you brother. I'm afraid I'm not qualified enough to give advice but I'm very interested what advice others might have.

Helpingafriend View Drop Down
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  Quote Helpingafriend Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 05/November/2017 at 01:36
Based on my experience, the answer to "fastest possible" with an ex who stubbornly refuses to act reasonably is probably several years. Although in my situation some of the delays were related to parenting proceedings, which will not be an issue for you.

Good luck

emca01 View Drop Down
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  Quote emca01 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 05/November/2017 at 09:06
80/ 20 seems a bit rich

Edited by emca01 - 05/November/2017 at 09:13

Time101 View Drop Down
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  Quote Time101 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 07/November/2017 at 12:33
Hi

Why did you leave the family home?? Do you on,u have one child ?
80/20 doesn't sound right as the son is 20.
If she has children under 18 she will be entitled to get more percentage if they are In her care full time.
Was she a good wife ? Did she look after you ?
Did she contribute to anything ??? Was she a stay at home mum?
Who contributed to what in the marriage ??
When you say wife suffers from mental illness (10 yrs) has she been diagnosed with a mental illness.
Clearly she still loves you and wants to work it out but if don't want to do that then I suggest you offer her a settlement percentage ..go 70% of your 1mil asset pool.

In the family court all is laid out so best way is to be honest... looks better on you and shows the court that you have at least tried.

If their aren't any children under the age of 18 then I suggest offering her 50% and you can move on.

Do you still love her or you actually want out for good.
If she is willing to work it out then only if you want to you can try if not then just tell her its over.

I have a mate of mine that's going through family court and he clearly still loves his wife.. but out of revenge and hasn't been amicable since the separation has make everything so hard and very difficult ... pride doesn't get you anywhere.

If no infidelity has accrued with either of you and you still love her then try to work it out... if she refuses.. then you have your answer.

As for spousal maintenance ... it's based on what your income is and what your expenditures are. As for time frame pay it only till property settlement is done. So I suggest put an offer to her and see what's her response.

Hope that helps. Please keep us posted and I do wish you all the best. Good luck in the offer to her.

Andyjaxon View Drop Down
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  Quote Andyjaxon Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 08/November/2017 at 15:51
Hi Time 101,
Thanks for your comments.
I will answer all your questions one by one then comment below.
Unhappy, needed to change my life. Yes only one child for both of us.
She is a stay at home house wife. Has worked a little casual work. Negligible though.
Married in 1995. My house. My shares. I have had a full time job all my life. She came with nothing.
Diagnosed Anxiety and depression for 10 years.
I am hoping that she understands that if we can settle outside of court we both will save money.
I want out for good.
If shes willing to talk I would rather give more % to her in lieu of spousal maintenance.

My next question is, if she wont talk turkey, whats my next move? And if we take years to get to a property settlement can she claim any of my parents inheritance should they pass away before the property settlement?

Time101 View Drop Down
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  Quote Time101 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 08/November/2017 at 22:01
Hi Andy.
Your welcome hope my comments helped you in anyway.

Have you talked to her about any proposal with a percentage amount including the spousal maintenance .. you must be the first male that actually is ok with paying his wife SM.. all the others that I know of had to fight for it and got as little or none from the outcome of trying to get it   

Since the only son is 20years old I think the settlement % is fair at 50/50.
as I've read from your posts you sound as though you would like to be amicable and try to get the negotiations rolling which is a good think most men like to drag it on and think their wife deserves nothing.

any inheritance you get ... yes she can claim a part of it
Get the papers drawn up and put out a proposal to her asap.
If she refuses and believes you haven't been fair. Then I would proceed with the family court.
Mediation In the courts I think is great. Not a fan of relationship Australia. (Not sure what state your in )

You don't need a lawyer if you go to family court. Paperwork is a lot and the papers involved but can be done and would save you $$$$$. Self represent.

Not sure how long you have been separated. File for divorce .. she can still claim on you until property settlement is finalised.

Maybe she's dragging her feet to get your inheritance from your parents if they pass away.
Some women love to play the game and ive seen some men do the same.
For them its some sort of revenge .. pretty stupid cause if filed in court magistrate overrules what's fair and what should be done.

With a friend of mine she self represented and did all paperwork when she filed in the courts ... had nothing to do with money or %. All she wanted was papers signed that needed to be done due to property they had both names on titles. He refused to sign... court overruled him and he had to sign. Family court was the only option for her as her ex hasn't been amicable from the day of separation. Hard for her when she was married for many years.

I've also seen the same when women do the same as the above comment.
Hope that answers some of your questions.
Wish you the best and please let me know how you go.

Peace

emca01 View Drop Down
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  Quote emca01 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 09/November/2017 at 11:20
ok so leaving the home was not a great idea.... Better to have stayed and sold then gone separate ways.. BUT that is problematic too...

80/20 is a lazy solicitor who is going to tell you he did good if he gets you a little bit more.

How much do you earn? spousal maintenance would not be for a long period and would be dependent on your capacity to pay.

Organise mediation with Relationships Australia (maybe - don't know if they do mediation when kids are not involved)
You could write to her and ask her if she would agree to put both properties on the market just to get things started... Might not be a bad idea to get a solicitor to write to her rather than doing it yourself...

Andyjaxon View Drop Down
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  Quote Andyjaxon Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 09/November/2017 at 11:40
Thank you emca01,
I think I had to leave the home as living there and having to deal with the separation and dealing with her would drive me bonkers.
I agree. I think 80/20 is a bit rough.
She when to Centrelink yesterday and her GP. Looks like she will be eligable for a Disability Support Pension, her GP said hes happy to sign off on it. Hopefully this will reduce the ongoing payments i'm making to keep the household going.
I earn 12K a month gross. I would like to do the best I can to avoid spousal maintenance.

Time101 View Drop Down
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  Quote Time101 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 13/November/2017 at 16:16
Hi Andy.

Any new on the above. ??
What did u decide to do ?

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